Tell Me If It Kills You

I'm frustrated.

I really don't know how to explain it.

I'm really gonna go crazy.

I have 7 ulcers. all on my lip.

2 more are currently growing.

by tomorrow, I'll probably have 9.

so, I came back from cheer.

with extremely painful lips.

therefore, I decided, "screw it. the pain doesn't last forever"

so, I just wanted to get it over and done with.

I took those cotton sticks, dipped it in salt

and scrubbed.

by scrubbed I meant, I scrubbed hard.

and still, the yellow stuff inside it didn't come out or anything.

but, it started bleeding.

and it wouldn't stop.

so I just gargled iced water to stop the bleeding.

and yet, nothing happened.

it still hurt.

so, I got angry and started eating like hell just to piss off my ulcers.

I ate spicy stuff and salty stuff.

that is "Things that are frustrating me" number one.

"Things that are frustrating me" number two is,

I cannot find my Boys Over Flowers DVD.

I paid 45 bucks for it. and it is gone. literally, abducted.

the problem is not me losing it.

I mean, it's just a DVD.

the problem is that, I did not misplace it nor was it stolen.

it has to be SOMEWHERE.

I know, it is obviously somewhere.

but it has to be around!

where could it have gone.

I've been looking high and low!

and I just, gahhh!

it has to be SOMEWHERE.

I don't know how to describe it.

I don't know how to say what I feel.

I feel so frustrated.

I mean, I know it's a small thing.

but, I just, can't leave it.

the ulcers nor the DVD.

it's just killing me inside.

I can't stop thinking about it.

and it makes me wanna pull my hair out!

I'mma get some rest.

shiiit.